Tuesday, March 29, 2005

I know- I know

I entered some of the links incorrectly on yesterday's blog.

For some reason (my friends say it has to do with Rosie's blog-) Blogger is acting

R E A L L Y



R E A L L Y


R E A L L Y


Slow.

I can't get in to edit the links. I will fix them soon.

Sorry.


Today is my estranged brother's birthday.
I have not seen him in over 2 years.

SAD.

Monday, March 28, 2005

In The Company...

I spent this weekend in the company of friends and in the company of new friends.

So much to tell!

On Friday, Jim, James, Gloria, and I packed up Miss Dodd and headed down to the pageant in Tucson. (Jim won!) Before we did that, I had the afternoon off. I got a haircut, and some new clothes for the weekend. It’s my first time out of town with no drag responsibilities (of my own) in some time- so I wanted something to make me feel good.

The road trip was fun (it always is, actually. Jim, James, and G are good traveling companions) and then we headed out to the show. I met a lot of people, but had the good pleasure of meeting two sweet boys named Joey. (Both of them.) They said they were fans, but despite their obvious lack of taste in drag, they took it upon themselves to show me around Tucson and to introduce me to some of their friends. I had the BEST time with them. Dancing, freaking, and carrying on at IBTS was just what I needed. An awesome time.

Saturday was the pageant. Like I said, Jim won. I was expecting to just watch the show, and help schlep Jim’s drag and his talent props to and fro. But he ended up needing some help backstage. Dressing him at the pageant gave me a different insight to him. We operate in two different styles- and I can say that I actually learned a little something from the way he does things.
After the pageant, I called Buddy with the results, and then we all celebrated in the rooms.

Even better than the pageant, the boys, the beer, and the dancing was the Easter BBQ Georgie’s mom invited us to. It was so fun. The weather was perfect, there was a GANG of food, and just lots of laughs and fun. I met another cutie patootie there, too.. This one was only 5 years old and acted like he had known me my whole life. It was hysterical: this five year old Latino kid asking tall, dorky, 23 year old white boy me if I wanted to play on the swings. He even offered me a drink of his grape sodie! I was having a Bud-Light sodie, so I declined.

After Paul and I trounced him in volleyball (we beat him like 12-1!) we had to head home for the show.

I am still beat.

A totally great weekend!

(PS, YOU made my blog, JOEYS!)

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Hey, Paula!




"Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!"
-Chris Rock

It seems that in addition to her multiple offenses to television viewers, world wide, Paula Abdul is also an inconsiderate driver,too.

Yup! When she is not offering banal words of encouragement to the kids on American Idol, popping pills before offering banal words of encouragement to the kids on American Idol, or discussing her inexplicable career offering banal words of encouragement to the kids on American Idol; she is the kind of 'ho that leaves the scene of an accident.

I wonder what she is mixing with tumblers of Coke she is always sipping on.

Oh, Paula! What are we gonna do with you?

Monday, March 21, 2005

Thank You For Your Participation!

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Sunday, March 20, 2005

In Good and Out With the Bad.

IT'S SPRING TIME!

It's as gorgeous a day as we have ever had here in Phoenix. Perfect weather to clean. So I am doing laundry, cleaning the house, organized my drag room (high time, too)..and clearing my head, too.

I spent the entire day in Tucson yesterday for the "Spring Street Fair."
Oh my dog, it was SOOO fun. The crowds were funny (and cute) and it was nice to work in Tucson again. I have not been there in over a year. Also really nice was working with Bunny and Tori, two of our Miss AZ sisters.


So Robert Blake was aquitted. HOW IN DOG'S NAME DID THAT HAPPEN?
I'm still shocked.

Thursday, March 17, 2005

I LOVE GOOGLE!

I admit it, I love google.
And not because of the fact that when you "google" (now a verb) "Miserble Failure" you get a a good example.

I do not love google because when you do a "google fight" of "Angela Dodd Drag Queen" and "Barbra Seville Drag Queen," I kick her pint-sized butt.

No- I love google because of the way they dress their logo for the holidays.
ANY HOLIDAY.
Woman's Health Day? Check.
Easter? OF COURSE!
Christmas? DUH!
And here is it's St. Paddy's offering:



It always makes me happy.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Proud of Your Boy

My dad is in town (AGAIN) and is staying with me for a few days.

I wrote a few days (weeks??) back about the Echo Awards. Well, I got nominated for favorite queen, (YAY! THANK YOU!) Distinguished Service by a Man, (WOW, Really Cool. Thanks!) and E-LOUNGE was nominated for favorite show bar.

Well, today my dad asked me why I never mentioned the nominations to him. To be honest with you (and everyone) I get embarrassed and refuse to campaign for these awards. I really want to win, but by the same token I realize that they mean nothing if you have to beg or hustle votes. In any case- I never mentioned it to my folks.

My dad mentions that I have been nominated for these awards and then tells me that he made sure his friend voted for me. He never mentioned voting for me, himself. Just tells me that he made sure his friend voted for me.

This was quite monumental.

I know that my dad is proud of me. I know this. But this was his way of telling me. His own awkward way of telling me that I made him proud and that he thinks I am special.

It choked me up a few hours ago- and it chokes me up right now.

Regardless of the outcome of the awards- I am cool.

The title of this post is from a cool song- cut from Aladdin.
It was given a second life when it was recorded by CLAY AIKEN.


Proud of your boy
I'll make you proud of your boy
Believe me, bad as I've been ma
You're in for a pleasant surprise

I've wasted time
I've wasted me
So say I'm slow for my age, a late bloomer
Okay, I agree

That I've been one rotten kid
Some son, some pride, and some joy
But I'll get over these lousin' up,
Messin' up, screwin' up times

You'll see ma, now comes the better part
Someone's gonna make good
Cross his stupid heart
Make good and finally make you
Proud of your boy

Saturday, March 12, 2005

TYPICAL GEMINI

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Tuesday, March 08, 2005

When You Get Lemons, Make HARD Lemonade...

One of the better things about my impending death is that I have almost completely lost my appetite.

It's great- I look like a war refugee!
My hip bones are sticking out like a wishbone!

I hope I can stay alive at least until this weekend. There is a big show this weekend with Phaedra, Angela, and Devina.
With Angela in the show, I can't be the skinny one, but if I keep up with this, I can be the second skinniest!


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Deathwatch: Day II



Well, I felt better this morning, so I decided to go to work. After the motorcade of ambulances, doctors, and the usual retinue of health care workers set up shop ay my office, I started feeling sick again.

It's not even 11:00, and I am considering going back home.

In other news, some phuck-wad has the nerve to come on to my freaking website and blog and tell me that being sick is because "One reeps what they sew."

I believe what his illiterate azz meant, was that one reaps what they sow.





In still other news, someone can to my house this morning to "measure me for a pine box."
I do not think that is very promising.

Monday, March 07, 2005

Wow, He Looks Really Good.

I imagine that is what everyone will say as they stand around my (gorgeous) body.
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"Wow, he looks great." One mourner will say.

"Death becomes him." A grieving ex-flame will sob.

"Is this an open bar?" Claudia will cry.

I am home, sick today. One thing I hate more than anything is using a sick day when you are actually sick.

From the way I feel, I assume it is either The Consumption, Typhoid, West Nile, Mad Cow, and E-bola.



I hate to be dramatic, but I ask that everyone use this time to review my wishes regarding my funeral.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005


Would you believe I woke up this morning in the foulest of moods?
I was sure I was going to call in sick. But today turned out to be very productive and very enjoyable.
The weather is perfect. The breeze is just right.



If I were a crayon today, I would be periwinkle.