Sunday, July 30, 2006

I NEVER Hated You, and I NEVER Will!

Kristi Van Shelton tracked down my favorite commercial.

Enjoy it.

It is STILL cracking me up@

fucking hypocrite



Fucking hypocrites

Fuck them.

Fuck them all.

Saturday, July 29, 2006


Has anyone besides me (and Chia) seen my new favorite commercial?

I think it is for Cingular's "GO" phone service?

A mother and daughter are yelling and screaming at each other, but they are saying nice things to each other.

The daughter yells "WHY DO I ALWAYS GET WHAT I WANT!"


It reminded me a tiny bit of Jerri Blank yelling at her mother "Do you have any idea how embarrassing this should be for me?"

It caught me off guard, and I laughed out loud for several seconds. In fact, thinking about it right now makes me laugh.

The tag-line is that Cingular will change the way you talk.

I googled it, went to the Cingular website, and looked all over, but I cannot find it.

Someone find it for me.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

You Owe Me Three Thousand Words

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Monday, July 24, 2006

Checking In

I am fine.
Since some people only check my blog (instead of emailing me, or calling me...) I will use this as a way of checking in with you. :0)

This weekend:
I saw SUPER EX-GIRLFRIEND. It was funny. Not the best movie, but one thing I loved about it is that the superhero begrudgingly saves the world. I always wondererd if superheros ever got tired of having dinners cut short, dates ended early, and quiet time abruptly called to a halt.

I ended up seeing this movie because I pulled one of my patented "Last Minute Movie Excursions." That is where I decided I want to see a movie, and then go directly to the theatre and see whatever is getting ready to start. I have only had a few truly awful experiences with this, one of them being "White Chicks." But I ate an appalling amount of butter-flavored popcorn, drank approximately 2 gallons of Diet Coke, so it was still a good night.

On Saturday, I had one of my annual dates. A friend of a friend thought I was cute (well, duh...) and asked to be set up with me (isn't that sweet?) We had a really fun afternoon, and I really enjoyed myself. I had to cut it a little short, because I had a show with Devina. After the show, I had breakfast with one of my friends who tends bar at Pookie's, and laughed my butt off.

Here is where I can prove I am a total idiot: I spent all day Sunday getting ready for the show at Charlie's, only to find out I was not in the show. Nice, huh? Miss LeHoot (the host of the show) told me to stay and just do the show, since I was there.

My number one drag pet-peeve is a crowded dressing room. I just hate it! I hate when I am in a show that is over-booked, I hate when I don't have enough room to get dressed, I hate when I have to dodge the other performers to reach my costumes or make-up. So there I was, ass-to-elbow with four other queens, but I could not complain, since I was theone who was not suppossed to be there! I ended up having a good time, but I still would have rather been home, watching Miss Universe.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

When I Die, I Want To Come Back As Tommy Lee

Or even as Dave Navarro, now that I think about it.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Let Me Get To The Pointe..

My friend, Devina always teases me because I am frequently booked to do events that are, let's say say "out of the norm."

Whether it is the Lobster Fest, Arizona Press Club, Make-Overs at Vidal Sasoon, or a fashion show at The Biltmore, I have worked some diverse gigs.

Why? Because I enjoy sharing what I do with other audiences, the pay is usually better than a gay bar, and you just never know who you will meet at these things.

A few months ago, I was booked to produce a show for an event at The Pointe at South Mountain. Nothing big, just a one hour show, and then interact with the crowd. The paycheck was nicer than most bar gigs, and it was an easy show. So I rounded up the usual suspects for this type of thing (Devina and Phaedra) and made a plan.

Phaedra had to cancel, so it was just me and Devina at the Pointe.

You should have seen the place. It was all decked, and had to have had about $100,000 worth of lighting, staging, and rigging. It was SWEET.

As we are waiting (and waiting... and waiting. We were booked for 10:00, but did not go on until 12) Devina and I key-keyed, and yucked it up about how many events like this I have roped her in to participating with me. All of a sudden, a slightly drunk woman asks if I can help her with her hair and make-up. She was going on stage and wanted to look different. So I pulled her hair up, added some clip on hair pieces, smoked herr eyes, glossed her lips, and then contoured and highlighted her breasticles.

She could not believe I made her look so glamorous. She loved it and got all excited. It was funny to see how much it changed her demeanor. All of a sudden she was letting us have all sorts of attitude. She went to diva in 2.5 seconds, kids.

It was very nice of her friend/husband/boyfriend to come back and say thank you (and slip a $100 bill in to my bra..)

We did our show, had a great time, made a few connections, and drank a few drinks. But we also exposed a whole bunch of people to another part of thier world. I also think that maybe we changed their idea of what a dragqueen is- and showed them a good time in the process.

So that is why I do that kind of stuff.

Well, that, and I get paid.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Alex, I will Take "6 Years Ove Due" for $500


Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Some Guys Have All The Luck

Monday, July 03, 2006

If I Do Not Say So My Self

I told you about winning the Echo Reader Choice Award for favorite female impersonator, right?

Well, I probably did not mention it, but it is the 6th (SIXTH) time in 7 years that I have won it. I think it is the 10th year in a row that I have been nominated. So I really wanted to win, ok?

Well, this year -like every year- someone has to try to rain on my parade.
WHATEVER. A few people have laughed and said that of course I won- I work/worked there.

Like I said, in TEN YEARS, I have 6 (SIX!) wins, and 10 nominations. I worked for Echo for 4 years.. so what about the other years?

It is so typical that people do that. More typical, that I react so strongly. One person was actually carrying on about it at a show. I think she was kidding, but she kept telling everyone how happy they were that her bar won an award. But then denigrated my win by saying that it was rigged because I worked there. Does that mean her win was rigged, too?

It only pisses me off, because I can look anyone in the eye and say that I don't think anyone tries as hard as I do.

No one. I see the same numbers, same clothes, same wigs, week after week.
Worse still, I see the same poeple borrowing my drag, and doing the same songs I do. The same people who copy my style or costumes.
I see the same people still not knowing the words to the same songs. I see the same people who are exactly where they were 2, 3, 5, or 8 years ago.
But I try hard, I push myself, I try to be creative, I try to be inventive, I try to evolve. I try to put drag (and my drag) in places it is not typically seen.

I know there are many better dancers, prettier queens, and better clothes out there. But I honestly believe that few people put as much effort in to being a well rounded entertainer as I do. It is easy to slack. It is easy to phone it in. But I try not to do that. I am proud of what I have accomplished, and proud of my name.


A LOT is two words....

But, my point is that I do not have a lot. BUT, I am willing to give a lot to my girl: HILLARY.
Here is why:

The Power of Hillary

By James Carville and Mark J. Penn
Sunday, July 2, 2006; B07

"Hillary Clinton really is one of the weakest . . . nominees with whom the Democrats could be saddled."

"Democrats are worried sick about her chances."

"Just give someone else a chance, so we in the Democratic Party can elect a Democrat."

"She cannot possibly, possibly win."

Yada, yada, yada.

We've heard all this "Hillary can't win stuff" before. In fact, the quotes above aren't from recent weeks but from six years ago, when many pundits -- and Democrats -- said there was no way that Hillary could get elected to the Senate. She won by 12 percentage points.

We don't know if Hillary is going to run for president, but as advisers who have worked on the only two successful Democratic presidential campaigns in the past couple of decades, we know that if she does run, she can win that race, too.

Why? First, because strength matters. Our problems as a party are less ideological than anatomical: Our candidates have been made to look like they have no backbone. But the latest Post-ABC News poll shows that 68 percent of Americans describe Hillary Clinton as a strong leader. That comes after years of her being in the national crossfire. People know that Hillary has strong convictions, even if they don't always agree with her. They also know that she's tough enough to handle the viciousness of a national campaign and the challenges of the presidency itself.

One thing we know about Clinton campaigns: Nobody gets Swift Boated.

The woman who gave the War Room its name knows how tough politics at the presidential level can be. Adversaries spent $60 million against her in 2000, and she endured press scrutiny that would have wilted most candidates. She gave as good as she got, and she triumphed.

For those who think that the politics of personal destruction might be rekindled against Hillary or her husband, we can only remind people how consistently that approach has backfired in the past. Bill Clinton would certainly be a huge asset if Hillary decided to run.

In fact, Hillary is the only nationally known Democrat (other than her husband) who has weathered the Republican assaults and emerged with a favorable rating above 50 percent (54 percent positive in the latest Post-ABC poll).

Yes, she has a 42 percent negative rating, as do other nationally known Democrats. All the nationally un known Democrats would likely wind up with high negative ratings, too, once they'd been through the Republican attack machine.

The difference with Hillary is the intensity of her support.

Pundits and fundraisers and activists may be unsure of whether Hillary can get elected president, but Democratic voters, particularly Democratic women and even independent women, are thrilled with the idea.

The X factor for 2008 -- and we do mean X -- is the power of women in the electorate. Fifty-four percent of voters are female. George Bush increased his vote with only two groups between 2000 and 2004: women and Hispanics. Bush got 49 percent of white female voters in 2000 and 55 percent in 2004. Of his 3.5-percentage-point margin over John Kerry, Bush's increase with women accounted for 2.5 percentage points. The rest came from a nine-point increase among Hispanic voters: from 35 percent in 2000 to 44 percent in 2004. We believe that Hillary is uniquely capable of getting those swing voters back to the Democratic column.

Hillary's candidacy has the potential to reshape the electoral map for Democrats. Others argue they can add to John Kerry's 20 states and 252 electoral votes by adding Southern states, or Western or Midwestern, depending on their background. Hillary has the potential to mobilize people in every region of the country.

Certainly she could win the states John Kerry did. But with the pathbreaking possibility of this country's first female president, we could see an explosion of women voting -- and voting Democratic. States that were close in the past, from Arkansas to Colorado to Florida to Ohio, could well move to the Democratic column. It takes only one more state to win.

Finally, for those who believe that Hillary's electoral chances are tied to ideology, not leadership qualities, we believe that she is squarely in the mainstream of America. Some people say she is too liberal, some that she is too conservative. We think her 35 years of advocacy for children and families and her tenacious work in the Senate to help ensure our security after Sept. 11 and to help middle-class families will serve her well. We think she represents the kind of change the country is yearning for: a smart, strong leader. She would take the country in a fundamentally different direction: closing deficits, not widening them; expanding health care coverage, not shrinking it. Fighting terrorism without isolating us from the rest of the world.

We don't know whether Hillary will run. But we do know that if she runs, she can win.

James Carville, a Democratic political consultant and commentator, was chief strategist in Bill Clinton's 1992 presidential campaign. Mark J. Penn was a key strategist in Clinton's 1996 bid for re-election and in Hillary Clinton's 2000 Senate campaign.

I have met her. I have basked in he star power (it is LUMINOUS!), I have seen the way she can whip a room in to a frenzy.
More so, I believe in her.

I am so glad to hear someone else say that he believes, too.